Clarity...

I am near-sighted, meaning I can see things up close fine but things far away are blurry. As a result, I wear glasses to help me see better and bring things into focus.

Light also helps bring things into focus, many times providing a different perspective. As a child, how many times did you think you saw a monster as soon as your bedroom light was turned off at bedtime? When the light was turned on, however, you discovered the 'monster' was just a lifeless object or shadow instilling fear. Light casts out darkness & fear.

Like many, I was so hopefully for 2020 and all it would bring. I thought, the year like 20/20 a.k.a. perfect vision, was surely a sign, per se, for the clarity & insight I would receive & experience this year. 

With COVID-19, recent tragic, heartbreaking, senseless and racially inspired deaths & events, and building tensions throughout our nation, things are being brought out of the darkness and into the light. This is the only way & place healing can occur. Conversations are being had and learning is taking place. Coronavirus-induced quarantine was the lens that revealed our busyness and, in some areas and cases, distorted priorities. The video of George Floyd's murder was the lens that exposed racism that the black community has been all too aware of and endured for generations & centuries. 

The blinders are off and a clarity has been brought to an evil darkness that has plagued our nation, communities, schools, businesses, and judicial system for far too long. The lens has changed for many. We have seen a vision that will not be forgotten. The view is clear and things have come into focus. The rose-colored glasses are off. During a recent sermon, Pastor Steven Furtick of Elevation Church said "Just because I don't experience it (racism), that doesn't mean it doesn't exist." 

I remember when I got my first pair of glasses. I told my mom things in the distance were blurry but since she didn't have my perspective, she thought I was just saying that to get glasses because some of my friends had glasses. She didn't have my vantage point so she did not think the problem was real, despite me telling her I could not see the blackboard in school. She relented and took me to the doctor to have my eyesight checked...and felt horrible when I was prescribed glasses and instructed to pick out frames.

In the Bible, as long as Peter kept his eyes on Jesus he was able to walk on water, however the moment he got distracted & looked elsewhere, he began to sink (Matthew 14:28-31). Sight & focus determine your direction. Glasses, light, and videos all bring clarity to blindness & darkness. 

Running Your Race...

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us..." (Hebrews 12:1 NIV)

Hebrews 12:1 is currently one of the motivating Scriptures that has kept me focused and going these past couple of months, actually past year. I get inspiration for posts during my quiet, devotional time or while running...and this post is no different; it came together tonight during my run in honor of Global Running Day.

We all have a race to run, our own personal mountain to move, challenge to overcome, or calling to fulfill. Running a race has its stages, per se, just like life with its new chapters, new relationships, new jobs, beginnings and ends.

Whenever I run a race, I start out with nervous energy and adrenaline pumping. This is good because it usually distracts my mind from focusing on the challenge ahead of me, and questioning what I did in the first place by signing up. My training only carries me so far, depending on how much and how long I trained so I count on this nervous adrenaline to fuel me for a couple miles. Then I calculate and count on energy gel packs to fuel a few more miles. I then rely on a surge of accomplishment and pride (in a good, healthy dose), coupled with my remaining reserve (or fumes) of energy, to take me across the finish line. 

It is on the race course, however, that perseverance is needed. What I say to myself during the race determines how I will finish. There are times where I've felt like I just cannot go on, run another mile, or complete another obstacle...but then, I see the mile markers and I start doing the math in my head and I realize I am closer to the end than I am to the beginning. Or I hear the motivational cheers of people, complete strangers along the course shouting words of encouragement to runners out of sheer support, which absolutely warms my heart and usually brings tears to the verge of falling & blending in with my sweat. I strategically choose my playlist as yet another distraction for the pain my feet feel, the ache in my back, or the regret for not training more. This is when I realize where I focus is where I go; if I tell myself I do not think I can finish or complete an obstacle, I won't; if I tell myself positive affirmations and remind myself that "I am more than a conqueror" (Romans 8:37 NIV), that "I am fearfully & wonderfully made" (Psalm 139:14 NIV), and I got this, I turn up the music in my ears and I keep going. 

But what do you do when there are no distractions to keep you from being overwhelmed by the task at hand, the challenge before you? When I participated in my first Camp Gladiator Stadium Takeover, I rolled my ankle at the very first obstacle station. I had a choice - stop there or keep going. So, I pushed through the pain; again thankful for adrenaline! During the last Cap10K race I participated in, as I reached the sixth and last mile, I accidentally spilled energy drink into my iPod. The music stopped and I had to run the final mile with only the thoughts and noise in my head.

Sometimes our race is a solo endeavor and sometimes we are called to run along side others in support & solidarity. We don't have to have the same fitness level, same muscle tone or have trained the same to be able to run along side someone and let them know that they & their race are more important to us than our own agenda, and that we'll reach the finish line together, encouraging each other along the way. 

Sometimes, we have more than medals & bibs to remind us of our race. Sometimes there are scars from falls, injuries to muscles, tendons or ligaments that we have to nurse back to health, slowly but surely, and sometimes enduring painful therapy in the process. I am in the best shape of my life but I also have more scars now than I did six years ago when my journey to being physically fit began. The scar on my knee is from when I tripped & fell during a Spartan race. The scar on my right hand is when I fell off a treadmill (don't ask, long story...the stop button didn't work when I needed it to...word of advice, don't run until you're about to fall to hit the stop button). 

In this race called life, not all our scars are visible from the outside. My divorce last year left a scar on my heart that has taken time & 'therapy' to heal. The body is an amazing thing and many times the injured body part ends up being stronger than ever, sometimes even more than before the injury was incurred. Yes, running your race builds endurance, stamina and perseverance. Sometimes you've trained and you're ready for the 'big day' and sometimes life happens and you just didn't train or prepare as you hoped or planned. But you show up, you push through, and you run your race in a way only you can, persevering through the pain & discomfort. You overcome and when you do, when you cross the finish line, you may have some scrapes & bruises but you also walk away with an accomplishment no one can ever take away from you. As I type that, I think back to my Spartan Beast obstacle race and 2015 when I completed a Spartan Trifecta. After all the races, I looked like someone beat the crap out of me with a baseball bat and it took a couple Aleve tablets and a long Epsom salt bath to make me feel human again but I would not trade the pain for anything in the world. I know what I am capable of, and am grateful beyond measure for what my body can do and endure, and I am a stronger person because of the experience. 

So, go run your race. You'll survive the trips & falls, the aches & pains, and when you cross the finish line, you won't remember the struggle as much as you will the satisfaction of what you just accomplished. You got this and I am cheering you on!!!   

Life's Inevitable...

"Hello, my name is Nicole and I want to be vulnerable & sincere; to live life to the fullest while I am here; to be in the moment & intentional while being authentic, raw & real."

I wrote those words in my journal this morning after a rich devotional & quiet time with the Lord, and after processing a short video I had just watched. In the video, the curator said we are not special, we are unique in that we will all go through pain because that is life; it is just a matter of when, not if, and in what form (i.e. death, disease, divorce, dealing with a loved one's addiction, etc.). How we deal and respond to that pain, however, varies from person to person and is determined by our unique makeup & wiring.

"Dance like nobody's watching; love like you've never been hurt. Sing like nobody's listening; live like it's heaven on earth." I want to walk out Mark Twain's directive because his wise words feel 'safe' & courageous; like a shield against all the negative life throws at us. Unfortunately, this 'utopic' perspective is not conducive to growth. For it is in and through pain & loss that we gain the ability to recognize and experience pleasure & love. Both sides of the coin are inevitable in life and it takes both for true growth & evolution to occur.

When I was learning to snow ski, I remember hearing "If you're not falling down, you're not learning to ski." How true! The same could be said for life. It is through the bumps & bruises, aches & pains, sweat & tears, struggle & effort that an athlete develops strength & muscle memory, children are born, butterflies emerge from the cocoon, and a seedling sprouts up through the dirt to bloom. 

Nature's truest example of beauty out of the muck is the lotus flower. After blooming from muddy & cloudy water, the flower emerges beautifully pristine. It is often what we learn in the process of walking out the pain & darkness of life that brings the beauty & light. 

Knowing life & death are inevitable, rather than burying our head in the sand or running for the hills in avoidance, imagine if we instead embraced acceptance of that which we cannot control or change? What if we asked ourselves what could be learned during the process, in the meantime, and in the midst? In typing those words, the Serenity Prayer comes to mind..."Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." Think how the learning curve could be shortened and 're-do's' skipped because, as I have learned and experienced, we continue to get 'the lesson' until we pass 'the test.'

We never 'arrive' in & on this journey called life. There is evolution in intentionally showing up, being present and embracing, per se, the unexpected & the often-desired avoidable. Sorrow & loss are as much a part of life's mosaic as are joy & gain. Growth never - if rarely - happens in the status quo. It is when we can release our grip of resistance & control that resilience & compassion emerge. 

I received a beautiful, colorful birthday bouquet of flowers today from a dear, lifelong friend. This sweet surprise brought an unexpected burst of joy to my heart and smile to my face. I know in a couple days the flowers will die. That is a fact I cannot avoid, deny or change, however, what will remain is the memory of her kind & thoughtful gesture, and the joy I received while the blooms were alive & fragrant. Polar opposites yet one does not exist without the other. So, lean into the pain and embrace the unknown, the unfolded and the unwritten of what is unseen and is to come. It is here, in this space of grace, grit & uncertainty, of pressing in but not being shaken by the uncomfortable & inevitable ups & downs of this roller coaster ride we call life, that we are truly alive and true transformation takes place.   

 

Masks...

For the past couple of months, masks have been and are being worn as a preventive measure against the spread of the coronavirus. They especially keep healthcare workers, front line workers and those with compromised immune systems as well as the general public safer and the spread of the contagious disease to a minimum.

However, it hit me the other day, long before the world-wide pandemic became an everyday topic, many of us were already wearing figurative masks. 'Masks' to help us feel as if we are enough but in reality provide nothing more than a false sense of confidence & security and are just safety & defensive measures; airs we don to hide our guilt, shame, insecurities, lack, deficiencies, past & failures. Because, we fear, if people saw the 'real' us - flaws, failures & all - they might not like what they see. We deem it best and 'safer' to keep up the impression & appearance that we have it all together...at least while we are in public.

I believe this is the appeal of masquerade balls, when & where we can take on a persona different than our own, real selves. If just for a short time, we have an air of mystery and can be someone other than our true selves.

Superheroes wear masks to hide and keep secret their real identities. Isn't this what we do everyday, trying to be the perfect...parent, spouse, employee, boss, son or daughter, friend, etc. After a while, however, the mask originally worn for 'protection' becomes cumbersome and uncomfortable; heavy with the weight of keeping up the façade, day in and day out. 

What if, however, we take off our mask and take a long, honest look in the mirror and accepted our perceived 'imperfections' as our superpowers rather than faults? By doing so, we allow, encourage & inspire others that it is okay to take off their masks, per se, as well to reveal, show & share their true identity, in all of its natural beauty & grace; flaws, scars & all.

So, be careful which 'mask' you put on & wear in public. The world needs the real you to shine forth & through.

Candles...

How do you reconcile when the candles that are (supposed to be) on your cake do not match the number you feel in your head, your heart, and/or how you feel in your skin?

Age is an odd thing...

In your youth, you have metabolism & wrinkle-free skin on your side. With age come wisdom & wrinkles along with experience & life lessons gained easily and through trials.

Yesterday, I had an AMAZING birthday. I would even say it was in my top four best birthdays of all time. Due to COVID-19, we all have had to adapt, adjust & redefine our 'norm.' I did not lower my expectations for my birthday observance this year, I just changed them...and that flexible pivot allowed my heart to be open & soar, basking in the beautiful unfolding that happened throughout the day. I was showered with an outpouring of love, generosity and celebration. I was engulfed by a sense of contentment, peace & joy that was overwhelming, hard to explain, and frankly took me by surprise; like the heartfelt glee & wonder watching a butterfly fly and then gently land. I was intentional and in the moment with the people I was 'with,' whether it was virtual or socially distant. I felt a chapter close and a new one open, waiting to be discovered & written.

Next year brings with it a candle that signifies a major milestone birthday for me. I am not going to be anxious or fret when that one little candle is added. Throughout the past couple of weeks, my perspective has shifted, per se, and allowed healing, love, hope, peace & joy to take up residence in my heart. It is as if all the seeds that have been planted throughout the years are finally starting to bloom. As a result, I am excited for the upcoming year and believe it will be my best one yet. After all, a candle is just a candle.     

Expectations...

While Cinco de Mayo commemorates the Mexican Army's victory over French forces at the Battle of Puebla, it also is the day on which my birthday countdown commences. To celebrate, I had tacos for dinner. I read rave reviews about the restaurant I bought my takeout from and the tacos looked yummy (see left) so I had expectations that they would indeed be good and worth my money. I was not let down; they were delicious.

Now, expectations for my birthday this year are a little different. In light of coronavirus, COVID-19, social distancing and sheltering at home, my birthday - as that of countless others - is going to look quite a bit different than it has in years past.

I was talking with my best friend today and told her that I was not lowering my expectations for my special day because, to me, that has a taste of defeat. I told her, instead, I have changed them. As soon as those words flowed from my lips, I realized their weight and a meaning that goes beyond my birthday. 

Like many, my expectations regarding the future have changed. Our 'normal' has changed but what if, as Pastor Steven Furtick of Elevation Church asked in a recent message, our 'normal' really wasn't normal but just familiar? "Things that make you go, hmmm..." (Cue C+C Music Factory's hit from the early 90's...sorry, I couldn't resist!)

God & I have been doing A LOT of work these past eight weeks. Walls & expectations have fallen, per se, like the giant Goliath in the Bible. I have pivoted from pain to purpose, hurt to healing, (perceived) rejection to redirection, grief to growth...and loss to love. God's love has permeated my heart, soul, mind and being to the point my expectations have changed from my ways, wishes & timeline to His ways, purpose & timing. We will emerge from this unprecedented time and we'll be okay,  however, the 'norm' we once knew no longer exists and the expectations once held so tightly have dissolved...which is not necessarily a bad thing. 

When faced with disappointment & outcomes other than what we would have liked, chosen, planned or anticipated, we are faced with a choice: we either lower our expectations to avoid further discomfort and pain, sometimes becoming bitter in the meantime...or we pivot and change our expectations, becoming optimistic & hopeful in the process. I know that is easier said than done, especially when expectations for milestones from graduations to weddings have been turned upside down, however, with changed expectations come new hopes, dreams, open doors, perspectives. Surrender blossoms in the place of control, peace takes root where anger had a foothold, and love emerges from a place where fear once reigned. Going forward, my expectations have changed and I could not be more excited for what lies ahead! Pivot or lower, now that is the question! 

Stay safe & Happy Cinco de Mayo...let the birthday countdown begin!

The Morning After...

With many celebrations, there tends to be a "Now what?!?" moment that follows, if not immediately, then the morning after. Easter is no different, or maybe I'm the only one who thinks this way?!?!

The morning after Easter's rejoicing left me in an odd state of reflection and "Where do I go from here?" contemplation.

During my worship & devotional time yesterday morning, I heard the song, "Tell Your Heart to Beat Again," by Christian contemporary artist Danny Gokey. 


You're shattered

Like you've never been before
The life you knew
In a thousand pieces on the floor
And words fall short in times like these
When this world drives you to your knees
You think you're never gonna get back
To the you that used to be

Tell your heart to beat again
Close your eyes and breathe it in
Let the shadows fall away
Step into the light of grace
Yesterday's a closing door
You don't live there anymore
Say goodbye to where you've been
And tell your heart to beat again

Beginning
Just let that word wash over you
It's alright now
Love's healing hands have pulled you through
So get back up, take step one
Leave the darkness, feel the sun
'Cause your story's far from over
And your journey's just begun

Listening to the lyrics brought clarity regarding the past couple of years, my resulting feelings, and my next steps suddenly became apparent & obvious. The morning after Easter brought me the peace & reassurance I needed, giving me direction on how I was to move forward into my future. 

It is as if the prior year and a half had been one long Good Friday, with closed doors, disappointments, and the death of relationships, dreams & the life I knew.

Then the quietness, stillness & uncertainty of that Saturday. I've walked out the "Now what?" dismay of what I believe the disciples and Jesus' other followers could have felt, thought & said, even if just to themselves. Add regret & remorse I presume Peter and Judas tortured themselves with and you have the makings for a brutally long wait plagued with doubt and second-guessing of what you thought you had, and how you assumed & believed things would occur yet would now never come to pass. 

I've been in a holding pattern, per se, walking out & living that quiet Saturday since January 2, 2020. We all have such high expectations, goals & aspirations for January 1st. The first day, of the first month, of a new year when all the setbacks & missteps of the past year are 'magically' wiped away. The slate is clean, ready for 'do overs' & resets. We have before us the blank page of a new year with new goals, renewed aspirations, revived determination, and the best of intentions; when wrongs will be made right and starts fresh & anew. Endings aren't always bad because beginnings follow. Setbacks sometimes are actually set-ups for what is to come. Some start new jobs, some new relationships, others new diets...I moved to a new state.

With the excitement & exhilaration of new beginnings & endless possibilities, I packed up my life in Texas and closed the door on one chapter of my life to open a new one in Tennessee. Then...the job changed, tornadoes hit, coronavirus spread, home quarantining mandated, and furlough happened. My anticipated next steps were replaced with "Now what?" and "Did I misinterpret what I thought I heard God tell me?" The need to pivot & regroup becomes imperative in these uncertain moments. 

But then came Sunday and the stone was rolled away. Gokey encourages in his song, we get backup, close the door of the past because we aren't meant to live there anymore. We tell our hearts to beat again because the empty tomb on Sunday brings back to life dreams & reassurance of plans and a promise to prosper, not harm us; to give us hope & a future. Resurrection & redemption of what was lost - whether temporary or permanent - causes our hearts to leap with joy, faith & excitement of what is to come. Confidence that we will see beauty out of ashes because nothing is wasted in God's economy & timing; we celebrate victory over death with a renewed purpose & resolve. Strength develops where weakness exists; courage & boldness emerge from where cowardliness & fear once had a foothold. We believe & have faith in a story that,while we do not know what the future holds, we know Who holds the future.

So, on the morning after Easter, we can face the new day with a peace that surpasses all understanding. That being said, we are human and it is our nature to 'self protect' until we have evidence that we are safe. Sure, we can be optimistic but we aren't going to blindly let our guard down & wholeheartedly get our hopes up; been there, done that...at least not until we see with our own eyes. Danny Gokey has another song, "Just Haven't Seen It Yet" which reminds me of the doubting disciple, Thomas. To Thomas, believing was seeing. He needed evidence of what he was hearing; until he saw the risen Lord with His scars, it couldn't be true. 

Faith, however, is hope in the things unseen. In the wake & light of my 'morning after' revelation, I am more determined, motivated & energized to make the most of every day and to believe, trust & take God at His Word. Today is a present, tomorrow is a beautiful blank canvas of hope & endless possibilities, and the future is full of new beginnings, dreams & promises yet to unfold. 

Death & Resurrection...

Death has to occur in order for resurrection to take place. 

Death of...relationships, plans, self. Blessed and released.

Resurrection of...promises, hope, dreams. Brought back to life.

I do not believe there is any coincidence we are walking out COVID-19 during Lent; a journey of, and to, decrease & death on the way to increase & life.

The past as we know it is gone; in its place a new perspective, newfound knowledge, trust, renewal. 

Light of 'that' Sunday morning shining through the darkness of 'that' Friday. Hope renewed & restored. An example of the deepest, purest, most miraculous & redemptive love endured one day so that a covenant is able to come to fruition with the new day dawning three days later. A promised fulfilled. Victory won. Sacrifice made for redemption.

What in your world, past, flesh, or thoughts need to be nailed to the cross to die in order for the resurrection of new hopes, dreams, prayers, and life?

From our limited vantage point of the here & now, like the disciples, we too believe the lie that 'death', an ending, or closed door is the finale of the story. We fail to remember sometimes the ending is a necessary step for the ultimate beginning. Just as the earth must go dormant for a season to allow for new life to spring forth in the next, perhaps it is time to breathe new life into and resurrect a dream, hope, relationship, desire or goal that has been buried, either for a long time or 'just' three days.

What if it wasn't too late for that 'thing' you forgot about or gave up on because, from your viewpoint, it looked hopeless, impossible or too far gone? Sunday was a new day of resurrection that followed Friday's death; but let us not skip over Saturday's waiting. The quiet & delay in the midst may be necessary, just like the hibernation of winter's rest, in order for growth or reawakening to emerge.

Rather than dreams and hope dying, perhaps it is regret, shame, fear & doubt that need to die, per se, and be released in order to resurrect the possibilities of a new day, a new chapter, a new beginning.

The past, with its pain, rejection, failures, mistakes, & dead ends, is gone and 'finished.' In its place, allow the future with its healing, acceptance, forgiveness, love & possibilities to arise.

Let the shadow of the cross be bigger, engulf and redeem anything & everything that has been done & said to & by you. Let disgrace be replaced with honor, weakness with strength, lies with truth, debt with forgiveness, and bondage with freedom. 

Observe and honor the death of Friday & the past to embrace and receive the resurrection of Sunday & the future. A funeral one day; a celebration the next.

Protection...

In these scary, turbulent, uncertain days of COVID-19 and coronavirus, people are needing to take measures & steps to stay safe & healthy. We can do things to protect ourselves & our families such as washing our hands, covering our cough, using sanitizer; all of which helps to protect our bodies from germs. We can get rest, eat sensible diets, exercise & keep socially distant to keep our bodies healthy & help minimize the spread of viruses. But how do you protect your heart & your mind during trying times? When the unknown & uncertainty loom larger than the known & certain?

I turn to God's Word, put on His Armor & pray, as instructed in Ephesians 6:10-18. The helmet of salvation protects my mind from the schemes & lies of the enemy. Daily I have to take my thoughts captive as instructed in Second Corinthians 10:5. In other words, I have to silence my inner critic, worries, doubts & fears by making what God says about me & my future louder than any negative internal dialogue that is on repeat in my head. The breastplate of righteousness protects my heart by extinguishing the fiery & flaming darts of the enemy. In Proverbs 4:23, God's Word tells us we are to, "above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Our heart is the wellspring of life; it houses our emotions & feelings, good or bad. It is said, we speak from what is in, or from the condition of, our heart. What do your words & actions say about the condition of your heart? God's been doing 'surgery' on my heart the past year...in fact, you could say He has performed a heart 'transplant,' taking my heart of stone & replacing it with a fleshy, new heart (Ezekiel 36:26). The thing is, with something that is new & tender, it is also vulnerable. I have to be more diligent in protecting it than I was with my 'old' heart because the walls I previous built up out of protection no longer exist. My 'new' heart is easily bruised & wounded, which is why it is more important than ever that I put on His Armor & read His Word daily, to receive His protection & remind myself of His truth. Without such protection, 'viruses' can infiltrate & attack my 'immune system,' rendering me susceptible to hurts that can cloud & decay my emotions, responses, actions, words & deeds over time.

Yes, we are in unprecedented times. Yes, we need to wash our hands for protection...perhaps it's also the perfect time to cleanse, per se, our hearts & minds for protection as well by 'scrubbing' what we allow in & access to both. Stay safe & sanitize on, my friends!    

Peace & Prayer...

"Through every battle,
through every heartbreak,
through every circumstance...
I believe You are my fortress..." 
(excerpt from "The Way" by Pat Barrett)

Warrior pose.
This image has so many meanings, from a yoga pose to the stance we take when we pray.
Yoga, like prayer, brings peace. 
Prayer, like yoga, channels our inner strength.
You could say in both, we leave everything on the mat.

There's a reason we're called to daily put on the Armor of God; to take up the Shield of Faith and to yield the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. Not only is it biblical, but when we arm ourselves with these weapons, we become warriors as we pray. In raising our Shield, we protect our hearts - the wellspring of life, the center of our emotions. In prayer, we go to battle for ourselves, our minds, our families, our friends, our country, the world, our concerns, etc.

When we take this warrior prayer stance, we become stronger, not weaker. We are never more powerful, and a bigger threat to the enemy, than we are when we are in a position of prayer; whether on our knees, face down on the floor, or in a chair with folded hands & bowed heads. In this posture, we take our fight to Heaven & God, and His angel army goes to battle on our behalf. 

Prayer opens the floodgates to Heaven and brings God's presence & peace that surpasses all understanding. When we pray, we take our concerns, celebration, & commitments to the Lord. In doing so, we humble ourselves and realize the battle is not ours; it is His...and He has already won the victory! 

These are trying & uncertain times. Put your trust in the One who is trustworthy, faithful & true. In raising our petitions & praise to the King of Kings, Lord of Lords, we are reminded that it is not by our might but in & through His that we are made strong. In His Word, God reminds us that "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:9-11).

This is how I fight my battles. God has never let me down & promises to never leave nor forsake me. He also promises, that when we draw close to Him, He will draw close to us. He bottles our tears and knows our needs before & without us even uttering a word.

So, call upon God in prayer & you'll find yourself in the most peaceful, powerful pose, per se, ever.

Compassion...

The following thoughts started flowing after reading today's 'Compassion Means Action' entry in Christine Caine's "Unshakeable" devotional during my quiet time this morning...

In the current craziness, and at times (if we let it), overwhelming uncertainty of all that is going on in the world, I pray that we lead, walk & act out of compassion...for others...and ourselves. Many times we don't realize something needs fixing until it's broken. Rest is easy to ignore until it's 'thrust' upon us, per se. For the most part, trying & difficult times thankfully compels us, out of our compassion, to want to help everyone. But what if, during these emotional, trying & challenging times, we're called to help & serve those in front of us...the ones in our immediate & direct path...you know, our 'tribe', 'squad', 'circle'...our family & friends. I have a running 'to do' list that, due to life's busyness, I haven't been able to get to...unpacking, exercising, adequate sleep, writing thank you notes, writing in general, working my side business, reaching out to & catching up with family & friends, finishing my 2020 vision board, authentic & intentional (versus rushed) devotional/quiet time...and the list goes on and on and on. So, in this 'forced' time of 'social distancing,' rather than allowing aggravation & inconvenience to take hold, I am taking a posture of gratitude for the time to reset, recharge, rest, reassess, & reprioritize. The timing of this all during Lent is interesting. Lent is a time when we allow space of less - less of: us, busyness, have to's, etc. in order to allow for more to come & blossom - more of: God, light, love & compassion. 

Trying times can bring out the best, and unfortunately sometimes, the worst in humanity & ourselves. Just this morning, while scrolling on Facebook, I read both about one friend's car getting stolen from their own driveway and about another's engagement. Polar opposite events, taking place within the same 24-hour span, that evoke polar opposite emotions & responses. I pray that we do not allow what's going on in the world to bring out the worst in us, i.e. fighting in aisles over toilet paper, but rather that we rise to the occasion and let our best, our most compassionate side shine forth & through...of course while washing our hands, covering our cough & staying safe. 

Love...

There's nothing you can do that can't be done
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung
Nothing you can say, but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy
Nothing you can make that can't be made
No one you can save that can't be saved
Nothing you can do, but you can learn how to be you in time
It's easy

All you need is love
All you need is love
All you need is love, love
Love is all you need

There's nothing you can know that isn't known
Nothing you can see that isn't shown
There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be
It's easy

All you need is love

(The Beatles/Lennon-McCartney,  1967)

When you slow down & look around, you notice signs all around you. Contemplating a move, I took a trip to do 'research': to explore and, get a feel for & gut check on, my targeted city. I was frustrated that I wasn't getting the neon sign, per se, of clarity & direction that I was seeking & wanted. I did, however, receive the signs I needed. Time and time again, 'love' appeared...in the most unexpected, obvious & subtle ways. 

We are wired to need the love & companionship of others...and actually flourish when received & experienced. That being said, that love does not, and cannot compare with the love of our Heavenly, Almighty Father. God is love - sweet all encompassing, redemptive love. In His gentle, oh so gentlemanly way, He reminded me throughout this trip of His love for me; that the city I was considering is a safe place for my heart & soul to receive healing, fertile ground to see dreams come to fruition, and that love could be experienced, received & walked out there. 

In addition to experiencing God's love, a new love started to take root. As a bud starts to bloom in the sweet spring sun, I felt self-love blossoming. The Bible instructs us in Matthew 22:39 that we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves. In order to do that, however, you have to first love yourself. On an airplane, in the event of a drop in cabin pressure, we're instructed to first put the oxygen mask on ourselves before others. There is a reason for this - we cannot pour into others when our cup is void & empty...or when we are lacking oxygen.    

In the backdrop of love and writing this post, I feel as though I have come full circle. It has been a little over a year since my last post. Much has happened during the past 12 months. There has been discovery & revelation; loss & gain; death, rebirth & growth; sorrow, pain & heartache; blessing & releasing; change & familiarity; healing & forgiveness; and hope & joy renewed. A year ago, with my last post, a significant chapter of my life was coming to a close...and now with this one, a new chapter & journey are beginning. It is amazing how things & life can change in what feels like a blink of an eye, when in reality it is over the course of a couple months or a year. Enough with the past though; I am looking & moving forward! I am so over the moon hopeful & excited to see what 2020 - a year of new vision, clarity & direction - holds and for what will unfold in the months to come. Hint: my (theme) word for this year is 'MOVE.' I want to move forward on dreams & goals; get moving athletically; be proactive; continue to grow, mature & develop in my faith walk, as a leader, friend, etc.; and my physical address/location could even change as well. A lot is going on in my world...stay tuned. In the meantime, love yourself & others well because, at the end of the day, love is all we need.