Expectations...

While Cinco de Mayo commemorates the Mexican Army's victory over French forces at the Battle of Puebla, it also is the day on which my birthday countdown commences. To celebrate, I had tacos for dinner. I read rave reviews about the restaurant I bought my takeout from and the tacos looked yummy (see left) so I had expectations that they would indeed be good and worth my money. I was not let down; they were delicious.

Now, expectations for my birthday this year are a little different. In light of coronavirus, COVID-19, social distancing and sheltering at home, my birthday - as that of countless others - is going to look quite a bit different than it has in years past.

I was talking with my best friend today and told her that I was not lowering my expectations for my special day because, to me, that has a taste of defeat. I told her, instead, I have changed them. As soon as those words flowed from my lips, I realized their weight and a meaning that goes beyond my birthday. 

Like many, my expectations regarding the future have changed. Our 'normal' has changed but what if, as Pastor Steven Furtick of Elevation Church asked in a recent message, our 'normal' really wasn't normal but just familiar? "Things that make you go, hmmm..." (Cue C+C Music Factory's hit from the early 90's...sorry, I couldn't resist!)

God & I have been doing A LOT of work these past eight weeks. Walls & expectations have fallen, per se, like the giant Goliath in the Bible. I have pivoted from pain to purpose, hurt to healing, (perceived) rejection to redirection, grief to growth...and loss to love. God's love has permeated my heart, soul, mind and being to the point my expectations have changed from my ways, wishes & timeline to His ways, purpose & timing. We will emerge from this unprecedented time and we'll be okay,  however, the 'norm' we once knew no longer exists and the expectations once held so tightly have dissolved...which is not necessarily a bad thing. 

When faced with disappointment & outcomes other than what we would have liked, chosen, planned or anticipated, we are faced with a choice: we either lower our expectations to avoid further discomfort and pain, sometimes becoming bitter in the meantime...or we pivot and change our expectations, becoming optimistic & hopeful in the process. I know that is easier said than done, especially when expectations for milestones from graduations to weddings have been turned upside down, however, with changed expectations come new hopes, dreams, open doors, perspectives. Surrender blossoms in the place of control, peace takes root where anger had a foothold, and love emerges from a place where fear once reigned. Going forward, my expectations have changed and I could not be more excited for what lies ahead! Pivot or lower, now that is the question! 

Stay safe & Happy Cinco de Mayo...let the birthday countdown begin!